First, our district is in the throws of a financial crisis. We are projected to be over-budget next year by $3 million. This means that somewhere along the lines, things need to be cut to make up the difference. We were asked, as a staff, to look around us and find places that we thought items could be cut. This list was submitted to the Board of Education, and then a final decision was made. According to this list, that the Board approved, 36 teachers in our district will lose their jobs. Money will be cut from the Athletic Department. Janitorial services will be cut back. But not a single administrator, either at the school level or the Board office level either lost a job or had a cut in their salary. Furthermore, the cost of our health care has gone up since January, and although we all received a 1.5% raise, it was not to counteract the increase in our insurance premium, which has resulted in me talking home less money each paycheck. It is so frustrating and disconcerting to see my colleagues, and potentially myself, lose jobs when the administration is not willing to do the same. The people (teachers) who have the biggest impact on the students and their learning are the ones being hit the hardest.
So you're probably wondering how I will be effected by this, and the short answer is: I don't know. There are several teachers retiring in my department, which will bump me up on the seniority list; however, I am not comfortable by any means.
Now all of these budget cuts and crap might not be so hard to swallow if the kids were decent human beings. I shouldn't say they're all bad kids, but why is it that one (or 30) bad apples spoil the lot?
I've been taking part in a monthly teacher development workshop (look for details in another post) that is held at our Board Office, which also houses all of the kindergarteners in our district. How cute and wonderful it is to see these young children, but I realized something today. Sometime between their kindergarten days and when they arrive to my classroom in the 9th grade, they turn into monsters. Gone are the days of saying "please" and "thank you," or holding the door open for someone, or not talking back or yelling the n-word or f-word down the hall to someone. In kindergarten, they know how to line up for a fire drill, and when the bell rings to dismiss them back into the school, they come back inside!
I guess one of the things that I try to do for my kids when it comes to literature, is to help them to make connections between what they're reading and their own lives. But I have one class that refuses to do such things, or to even believe that it could be a possibility. We're reading The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian about an adolescent Native American boy who sees that his dreams have a better chance of being realized if he gets out of his current situation. He's bogged down by his alcoholic parents and the mentality of those around him on the reservation, and he longs for something greater. So he ventures off the reservation and attends the all-white high school just over the boundaries. The protagonist lives among poverty and deals with similar situations that my students do. But they refuse to see these similarities. Even when I try to point out the obvious similarities, they still won't open their minds to making connections. This is so frustrating!
I strive to come up with and/or implement new and creative teaching strategies, but these kids, the kids who everyone else has given up on and are in the 9th grade for the second time, don't want to do the new and fun stuff. They are most happy and content with a worksheet and questions. What a paradox!!
Lastly, I'm all for building dreams and getting kids to work hard for goals, but I've realized lately that we're doing a lot of our kids a disservice, and particularly the special ed kids by making them think they can be anything they put their minds to. Call me a dream crusher (I might as well just tell them there's no Santa), but it's not realistic to think that the kid who can't read beyond a 4th grade level is going to be a doctor, or that any kid is going to play in the NBA, or that one of my girls can be a professional singer. If a kid hasn't been discovered by now, they can kiss that dream goodbye.
So why are we helping kids to believe/think that they can do these things? Maybe because I'm not a parent I don't have the right perspective, but how do you find the fine-line between helping kids set and want to obtain goals, and setting realistic goals that they can reach?
Like I said before, I'm a little disillusioned by my work right now. I know that this is just a season and it too shall pass. But it's times like these that make me wonder why I put in so much time and effort to get so little out of it.
Big picture, little picture.
1 comment:
I have little hope of getting a teaching job this fall but I'm starting to wonder if I want one...
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